Get a Grip and submit to Half Nelson!

You know us here at the Toucan; we don't believe we exist in a vacuum. We don't EVEN vacuum, and besides, it'd be awful dusty if we did live in there. But as you might know by now, we're not shy about letting you know about some other publications that you might want to submit to--they meet with our seal of approval--which is a smoke ring, in case you were curious (it is not an actual seal, Laura's pool isn't big enough). The benefit of this is twofold--first, you all know about another place to get published (you all want to get published, right?), and the publication itself gets some new submissions, and as we know all too well, publications need submissions in order to continue.

To that end, here's a new zine done by two of Liz's pals, Sam LaFountain and Jon Natzke, called Half Nelson, a name which submits almost as nicely to puns as the Toucan, although it has been known to turn on you and pin it to the ground. We'd tell you to submit anyway, without having read the first issue, but we did and we were completely blown away. Kick. Ass. Writing. Especially awesome is the lead piece, "Marriage" by Chelsey Baggot (who will appear in our upcoming Spring Issue, we're loving that) complete with tentacles, Jon's own meditation on Lake Michigan trash, and a vegan-approved break-up tale by our own dear friend and purveyor of humorous erotica Greg Baldino (remember "Camera Shy"? You really can't forget). Short, yes, but grabbing a hold of you in a way you have to notice. Plus, they have a color cover, which is just wonderful and a distinct advantage over us. We're sorry to tell you they don't post pieces online as of yet, but take it from Liz, it was a great read. Which is where you come in.

Half Nelson wants to throw down a second issue and they so should--but they need submissions aplenty! There's a few big advantages to sending work here too: they don't care if you decide to send work somewhere else after you publish with them--in fact, it's encouraged, so you can get two credits for the price of one. They're also open to a variety of forms: yeah, you got the fic/poetry/art, but essays, reviews, articles--and they love funky, nerdy, fantastic stuff! Finally, they will give you an awesome contributor name when your piece is published: for instance, The Great Baldino was tagged "Sexi_Dalek79", which works SO well if you know him and/or a smidge about Doctor Who. Go wild! Check out the full guidelines at http://halfnelsonpress.wordpress.com/, and work goes to halfnelsonpress@gmail.com. Did we mention they have a "games" page in the back of the mag?! Isn't that alone enough to make you want to tear over to your computer and send them a great big wad of prose?

And also, we have to say, Sam "The Pantha" is after our own hearts in the school of fun editrice (she deserves that title) posts. If nothing else, go to the site just to read her way with words, like this measured yet witty exhortion to look over your piece before sending it:

"Think of it this way, look at your piece one last time before you send it to us. Does it seem like that weird kid in the back corner of the class who kind of talks to himself and smells distinctly like Fritos? Is it something that if read at your Family’s Thanksgiving Dinner would probably have Aunt Etie keel over in the Salad bowl with her third heart attack? Or is it something you know will always be misunderstood and you like it that way?"

Really, we can't say this enough, we want you to send them some work. Editrice Liz will be doing so herself shortly. So come on, get in the ring, and may the best piece win for this new and awesomely funky publication. We'll love you forever if you do, and after all, who wouldn't a Toucan's love?